Oh noes! Help, please! Mom is getting smart!

So, furriends, it's me, Colby. I needs ur help!

I have been *looks around furtively* sneakin' outside. How? I'm glad you asked.

Mom and Dad have a hole in the screened-in porch place!

I snuck out, and Mom brought me back in, and found the hole and covered it up.

Now, as you know, I am furry smart *preens*. So, even though they covered up the hole, I found a way out, by pushin' the covering-up stuff aside.

And Mom brought me back in, all grumblin', and made it harder, but I kept finding ways out.
So they put heavier stuff in front of the hole, and on the outside where the hole was, too, and it was LOT harder, but I ran all the way across the porch and did a body-slam into the heavy stuff, and pushed it away, too. 'Cause I'm smart AND strong.

But *sigh*, Mom Saw me.

And when they brought ME back in, Fancy, who is pretty smart, too, sneaked out!

At night.

And you know what? Beans don't see so good at night. They go stumblin' around. Isn't that weird?

They searched for Fancy lots and got scared, because this is her new home and Mom worried she would get lost and not know her way back. But Fancy came back, and Mom was happy.

Dad couldn't fix the hole, because he's been painting since we were getting Car Pets. And Mom and Dad wanted the door to the screened porch open when the Car Pet guys were putting in carpet, so they could move the furniture and stuff. So I could get out, but Mom and Dad got really tough, and when I did, Dad, who was getting mad because I am so smart, would put me in the little shallow pool and get my feets wet!

I did NOT like that!

I think they wanted to keep me from going out, but I just made sure I hid better so when I DID get out, they couldn't find me so well.

Mom put a collar on me wif my name and our phone number, which I hate because it has a tinkly bell thing, so I can't hunt like a Mancat.

I has all my yucky shots and stuff, so Dad says Mom should stop worrying, but Mom still does, and wants the porch fixed because she thinks I'll get eaten by a Woofy or sumfin'.

She's like that.

So, all this week, it's been me tryin' to be sneaky and get out, and Mom watching me like a hawk and not letting me have any fun.

But then! Mom got sneaky! Yes, Mom. Moms aren't supposed to be sneaky!

You know what she did? She let me go out on the porch again, BUT she put some strange thing called a PetCam around my neck! Only for a little while, but it got in my way when I went out (of COURSE I got out!).

I came back through the hole myself, and pretended I had been a goody -goody cat and not gone anywhere. And Mom took the Pet Cam off.

Anyway, once she took it off, I figured I was in the clear. Only the thing is...

Mom knows I went out! And, horror of horrors, she knows my bestest hiding places!

Because the PetCam TOOK INCRIMINATING PICTURES!



See, here in the first two pics, I'm pretending to be good, on the screened porch with Cheddar, who never escapes (I think he's just too skeered).

And then here I am running around, you know, hidin' in the grass. You can see our neighbor's houses and the trash cans and stuff.




So now what should I do?!



Mom knows where I hide, and she won't let me out without my collar, and I don't want to wear the Pet Cam thing around my neck because everyone will know where I go!

Help!